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I was recently asked by a friend how he might find himself a decent girl. Apparently, they’re a diamond in the rough in this day and age because he seemed a bit jaded and fed up with seeing chicks popping their tits and bits out of their shirts and skirts, and sleeping with every dude lined up on the inside of Cook County Jail. One could guess finding a “decent girl” is about as uncommon as finding a decent guy.

I’ve heard this from more than one man on more than one occasion.

Mind you, he’s a very young man but he’s handsome and sweet and a good catch. He’s a modern thinker, has a decent job, and has a pretty good attitude about life.

“How can a guy like me find a decent girl?” he asks.

Funny I should hear a man ask this at all because lately all I’ve heard from most men, especially his age, is where they can find a chick who’ll ball no strings attached. I digress.

To tell you the truth, there’s a reason it’s hard to find a decent girl. And truthfully, the reason isn’t anything but a sad and painful reality. But it’s definitely not a hopeless one.

He wants a decent girl. One that he can treat right who will appreciate him for all the wonderful and thoughtful things he wants to do for her. One that he can see himself with, possibly marrying, having children, and being a faithful and loving partner.

Ironic that his story is not much different than all the single girls out there who want the same thing. No?

Unfortunately, in all honesty, it’s hard to find a decent girl who enjoys being treated well BECAUSE MOST OF THEM DON’T KNOW WHAT IT MEANS TO BE TREATED WELL.

Most of them get off on dating jerks who are married, who are assholes on purpose, who use them, who cheat, lie, and string them along for years, and are no less than manipulative sleaze buckets looking for a free ride on some willing and dumb free ass.

And the reason the girls pick these pricks is because they don’t know shit about life or themselves. It takes a person with life experience to know what they want to get out of it, and unfortunately you can’t know that as a half-cooked egg that has yet to be brought to simmering boil.

As much as I’d like to point him in the right direction, it’s tough to send him there because most young women his age aren’t seasoned enough to know the difference between being treated like a lady, and being treated like a pile of wet dirt- the dirt they mistakenly think they are that functions better being stepped on than thrown back in the faces of the asses of which they’re dumbly and desperately dick-whipped.

However, I’m going to try my best to help him, and other dudes out there figure out how they can accomplish finding a decent girl out there among the masses of thick-headed hags who don’t know their rear ends from a balled up fist.

Consider dating the “average” girl.

A lot of guys say they want a nice girl. A nice girl who wants a nice guy.

Although a lot of times they also want the nice girl to have a nice ass, a nice rack and some nice long legs a yard underneath a nice perfect little face. It’s true, not all of them say that but a lot of them are thinking it. This is what they want:

And they want her to be just as nice as she looks. Well, I’m here to tell you that 99 times out of a hundred, THIS KIND OF CHICK DOESN’T EXIST TO BE NICE TO YOU OR ANY OTHER MAN COMING DOWN THE PIKE. Nicey nice and picture perfect all rolled up into one is damn near impossible. You may want to set your sights more along this:

She’s your average girl. She’s cute and I’ll bet she’s very sweet and caring, even smart. And I’ll bet she appreciates things that girls of a “higher standard” just don’t get. I hate to be the one to generalize, but when a person isn’t out there with all the resources required to inflate egos and make them “invincible” to rejection and endless options, they’re going to be more realistic, down to earth and more appreciative of what you have to give.

Be more realistic about what you want and be willing to compromise.

Consider dating someone a bit older than you.

There are lots of women out there over 30 who are single. They’ve recently divorced, or gotten out of bad relationships (much needed life experience) and they are ready to take the plunge.

And for you younger guys (older ones too), I can tell you a woman in her 30′s has a lot to offer.

Generally she’s mature, doesn’t play head games, she’s career-oriented, and has a high sex drive. Women peak sexually in their 30′s, or somewhere around there and you’re going to have fun having great sex and enjoying deep stimulating conversation WITHOUT ALL THE BULLSHIT OR THE DRAMA.

A good friend of mine told me (he was 25 at the time) that he only dated women in their 3o’s and 40′s. I asked him why and he said because they’re outstanding in bed and they know exactly who they are and what they want. I can tell you he’s absolutely right.

For the younger guys, give a girl with a few years on you a shot. It may be the ultimate experience of your life. Want to trade baby games, insecurity and stinky diapered up toddler crap for some laid back fuss-free fun? Date an older girl and don’t knock it ’til you try it.

Consider taking your time in feeling a chick out before you see how she’s going to react to good treatment.

Younger or older, ask her how she feels about being in relationships and ask her about her past. Have her describe to you what kind of men she’s dated and their character and how things eventually turned out. Ask her what she wants and what she sees for herself down the line and PAY ATTENTION TO HOW SHE BEHAVES. As I’ve said before, ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS and if she’s giving you lip service on how she’s a good girl but goes out every weekend and gets beefed up and blasted, SOMETHING ISN’T RIGHT.

Take your time and let her reveal herself to you BEFORE YOU DECIDE ON HER. Date a few girls at once and get to know them as friends and see how their relationship patterns set precedent for what’s bound to unfold with you.

She’ll either be hanging her up her drawls and ditching you for the next guy because her skanky ass is bored, or she’ll be genuinely interested in getting to know you because you’ve been patient, nice and decent enough to wait. If she truly wants a nice guy, she won’t be out there doing up skanky shit.

Don’t resort to treating chicks like crap. Just be yourself and any real woman will be more than happy to be with a man who treats her right.

Nice guys, whatever you do, DON’T SCALE BACK BEING A GENTLEMAN WITH A BIG HEART SIMPLY BECAUSE YOU THINK IT ISN’T GOING TO WORK FOR YOU IN THE LONG RUN. Being a prick only works for girls who love being treated badly by pricks. It doesn’t work for real women who truly want and know they deserve a nice guy.

I wish I could tell you finding a decent girl was easy, just as much as I wish I could tell my female readers it’s easy to find a decent guy. Yet, they’re out there and we often have to sift through the deepest side of the crap pool first in order to know what it is before we’ll get it. But don’t give up, she’s out there if you keep your mind, your eyes and your options open. Good women deserve good men and you’ll get it while it’s good.